As a marriage therapist, I have observed that finances tend to be a topic that is regularly brought up. It is essential to remember that in a relationship/marriage, you are a team and need to work collaboratively. Being honest with your partner about finances is an important aspect of transparency and trust.
Listen to podcasts about finances together to make financially responsible decisions
The idea of this blog post is to share resources for couples to make financially smart decisions. If you need to schedule a counseling appointment, please contact me.
In my lifetime, I have had the opportunity to meet genuine, caring, and charismatic leaders. Those who demonstrate these characteristics are admired and easy to follow. First, influential leaders have excellent social skills to interact with and motivate people. Starting a conversation and maintaining a conversation is key to developing a rapport. Most importantly, effective leaders know how to listen and share the spotlight with their employees.
Trusting Your Employees
Influential leaders trust their employees that they are creating and producing great work. Additionally, an effective leader knows how to give more positive reinforcement than negative. A rule of thumb that I like to use is the 5:1 ratio. A person needs to receive five positives to one criticism. Practicing these skills is how trust is built in a work environment.
Empathy
It is essential to have practical empathy skills when working with people. There could be environmental barriers that can impact someone’s ability to perform well in a workplace. An effective leader knows how to listen and provide support to an employee. Creating a caring work environment empowers people to be resilient when adversity happens.
Conclusion
As a therapist, I have given counseling to many folks who are experiencing work stress. Often, the work stress is due to ineffective leadership practices that negatively impact people’s mental and physical health. Therefore, effective leaders know how to engage in active listening, develop genuine trust with employees, and are empathetic. When leaders have these key social skills the retention in job places is high, and the morale is strong. The mental and physical health of people in the workplace matters!
Preparing to lose a loved one is a challenging situation in life. The problem can cause confusion, sadness, and anger. There are different stages of grief, but they do not happen linearly. The emotions can be inconsistent; however, having these feelings is normal. When this happens, it is essential to practice self-advocacy skills to seek support from family and friends. Having a support group helps with the grief process and being resilient. Therefore, here are vital resources and activities that may be helpful for family members who are in the process of losing a loved one:
Engage in self-care by doing activities that you find enjoyable. It may be exercising or doing a favorite hobby. It is important to enjoy the good times and memories you experienced with your loved one going through the last stages of life. Engaging in storytelling releases oxytocin in the body. Oxytocin is known as the love hormone, which helps to bond and heal.
Have a candid conversation about what your loved one wishes to do after he/she passes away. It can be a difficult conversation, but it is necessary to know your loved one’s wishes. If necessary, it may be crucial to seek legal advice from an attorney that can guide you through this process.
Seek support from a therapist to help you process the grief that you are experiencing. If you need support in this area, please contact me.
Lastly, feel free to look at this link for additional resources regarding grief and loss. Remember, you must practice self-kindness during this difficult time in your loved one’s life, yours, and your family.
In this short blog, learn about the positive impact that laughing has on your health. It has been proven that laughing boosts your immune system, relieves pain, and it improves your mood. Some of the videos embedded in this blog will provide further details on the impact that laughter has on your biopsychosocial well-being. Then there is a TedX video where you can sit back, listen, and enjoy comedic entertainment to apply the skill of laughter in the present moment. In the end, I recommend two podcasts from the Hidden Brain that will provide in-depth information on the physiology of laughter.
Learn which parts of the brain are activated when laughing
Improves the Immune System
On average, humans laugh 17 times a day. It has been proven that laughing improves your immune system. For instance, when you are laughing it releases neuropeptides (oxytocin and dopamine) that help to fight feelings of stress. It is known to be the best stress reliever, and therefore, improves the function of your immune system.
Neuropeptides are released when laughing
Learn more about the immune system by watching this short clip
Relieves Pain
According to Medical News Today, a team of Swiss researchers found that people who are laughing can have increased pain tolerance. A hypothesis is that laughing releases endorphins, which alleviates muscle tension.
Watch this short TedTalk that will make you laugh
Improves Mood
There is a relationship between laughing and improving mental health. When you are laughing, it helps you to relax and recharge your energy. Therefore, it decreases the feelings of anxiety, anger, or sadness while you are laughing. If your mood is more stable, then it clears your mind and you are able to make better decisions. Additionally, laughter is contagious and it may bring you closer to your social groups by engaging in laughter together.
Recommended Podcasts
To apply the skill of laughter, here are some recommended Podcasts that you can listen to while driving to work or while you are at home:
Try to engage in laughter regularly to improve your overall well-being. By engaging in laughter with others around you, then it will have a positive impact on your relationships.
As a therapist, I often get asked how long it will take to make changes in behavior. In order to make changes in behavior there is a process and it takes time; therefore, patience and consistency are key characteristics to move toward the right direction. First, there needs to be awillto want to change. The motivation needs to exist to make preliminary steps toward change. Once there is a will, then the focus changes on howto make behavioral changes. Executive functioning skills are necessary along the way to accomplish the goal(s).
Executive Functioning Skills
In order to execute a goal and make changes in behavior executive functioning skills need to be applied. Executive functioning skills are composed of the following areas:
Once the SMART goal has been created, then it is time to take action. While taking action, it is important to stay consistent. After the desired behavior has been learned and practiced, then it is key to maintain it in order to not revert to undesired behaviors.
Learn about the Stages of Change
Conclusion
It is necessary to be self-aware that there is an area that needs to be changed. Then a SMART goal needs to be created and be able to take action in a realistic manner. To maintain the changed behavior it’s important to stay consistent.
There are lots of benefits of having a pet. In the United States, approximately 70% of people have a pet. When you’re petting your fury friend, the love hormone oxytocin is released in your body, which allows you to feel connected to your pet. Additionally, you can even practice mindfulness with your pet! Now watch the short video below to learn about the 7 ways that pets can improve your mental health.
This summer I have been watching docuseries on Netflix that teach about mental health. I will provide the top 5 docuseries that I recommend to help address depression, stress, anxiety, and insomnia.
Explained, The Mind
The Mind docuseries is very interesting because it teaches about memory, sleep, anxiety, and mindfulness. Each episode is approximately 20 minutes long and it is full of important information about the biopsychosocial factors of mental health. Some of these episodes can be watched more than once to capture all of the information that is provided. I often recommend taking notes to assist with being able to remember relevant information.
Human: The World Within
This show focuses on the biology and chemistry of the human body. I personally enjoyed watching every episode because it highlights these areas:
What is a cell? What is a neuron?
What types of chemicals are needed in the body to maintain good mental health?
Which area of the brain is in charge of emotions?
How is the gut connected to the brain? Why is the gut the second brain of the body?
How are senses vital to how I feel and navigate life?
Understanding the science behind the human body is crucial in making positive decisions about mental health.
HeadSpace Guide to Meditation
HeadSpace Guide to Meditation is a good start for beginners in practicing mindfulness. Each episode is also 20 minutes long. At the beginning, it goes over psychology facts and research related to meditation. Then the last 10 minutes it teaches a specific guided meditation activity. This is helpful to practice outside of therapy sessions.
Headspace Guide to Sleep
It is not uncommon for someone who experiences stress, depression, or anxiety to experience problems with falling asleep or staying asleep. This docuseries teaches specific strategies that can be done to address insomnia. This show will teach about the myths and facts of proper sleep. Additionally, at the end of every episode it teaches a guided meditation activity to fall asleep.
The Doctors
This docuseries covers different aspects of the human physiology. There are specific episodes that are relevant to mental health, they are:
Diet
Sleep
Exercise
Gut
Alcohol
Each episode is approximately 30 minutes. These episodes will provide further understanding on how the food that is ingested impacts the brain and the gut. Additionally, it will teach about setting proper boundaries with technology before going to bed and how exercise has a positive impacts on the human body. Lastly, it teaches on the negative impact of alcohol on the developing brain of an adolescent. Alcohol is a depressant that can cause a negative impact on the brain and body when it is being abused.
Conclusion:
As a therapist, my goal is to support people once they step out of my office. Applying on what is learned during therapy sessions is key in order to live the best life possible. These docuseries are supplemental to the therapy sessions.
This is part-3 to the series that I have written on Emotional Intelligence. When there is a problem, you must be able to identify your own emotions and the emotions of others regarding the problem at hand. Addressing a problem requires being able to manage stress in an effective manner. While addressing a problem it requires self-coaching or you can ask for help from a professional or family member in order to help you to be successful.
Problem-Solving
In life, everyone will experience problems. Some of the problems are small while others are a lot harder to handle on your own. As a therapist who works with people of all ages, I always like to use the visual from the Zones of Regulation to ask people to identify how big is the problem. Sometimes the brain can perceive the problem to be bigger than the reality of it.
Image is from the Zones of Regulation Curriculum
When I am listening to stories from my clients, I like to use visuals with my clients. In my personal life, I also use visuals to help me tackle the biggest problems (problems can be positive or negative). Therefore, if you are my client, I may ask the following questions:
How big is the problem to you right now? (small, medium, or big)
What emotions do you have about the problem?
Is your perception of the problem objective?
Do you know how to overcome the problem?
If the answer to the last question is “no,” then that’s when visuals come in handy. When a problem is perceived to be big, then it means that it needs to broken down into smaller steps. A client can draw it out or use sticky notes to move the steps around (See video below on how to break down steps of a problem).
Use Visuals to Breakdown the Steps
Once the steps have been broken down, then it is important to visualize yourself doing the steps.
Visualize Yourself Tackling the Problem
Conclusion:
To conclude, emotional intelligence means being able to identify the size of the problem and having a reaction that is equivalent to the problem. Then you must be able to figure out how to address the problem by breaking down the steps and visualizing yourself tackling the situation.
